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Mila came to me after devouring three sleep books and joining two online sleep solution groups. She’s a high-powered banker, disciplined, solution-oriented, and used to tackling problems herself . In her career, she thrives on logic, structure, and control — so she thought she could “solve” her sleep the same way. She followed every rule to the letter: strict bedtime, precise wind-down routine, perfect sleep environment. She measured her sleep, adjusted her habits, and even t

With winter break coming up—Yeshiva week, family trips, a little time off—you might already feel that familiar twist in your chest. For some, a break equals rest. For others, it equals travel insomnia . Take Dalia, a mom of four. Her family lives in Europe, and her parents have a cozy house in upstate New York that she used to love visiting on extended weekends. She traveled a lot, and for years, she genuinely enjoyed these trips—the packing, the drive, the comfort of her par

Amy’s baby is almost ten months old. When she reached out to me, she barely made it through saying hello before dissolving into tears. Not dramatic tears. Quiet, exhausted tears. The kind that comes from holding yourself together for too long when everything already feels fragile. Amy is navigating postpartum depression. She’s on medication. She recently separated from her husband. She’s living in her mother’s basement because being alone with her baby feels overwhelming rig

Her voice cracked on the phone. You know that sound — when a mom isn’t just tired, but done. When she’s tried everything. When nights feel longer than days and hope feels thin. She told me about her 9-year-old son, Moishe. He’s smart. Exceptionally creative. The kind of child who can draw, cut, glue, and create for hours without stopping. His imagination is endless, his ideas nonstop. She said, “When he’s busy, he’s in his zone. He could do this all day.” But evenings in thei

It’s usually sometime after lunch. You’re not bored. You didn’t sleep terribly the night before. And yet… your eyes feel heavy, your body slows down, and sometimes you even feel a little cold or shivery. Most people fight this moment. They grab coffee, push harder, or tell themselves they’re being lazy. But what if that feeling isn’t a problem at all? What if your body is doing exactly what it’s designed to do? I once heard a story on the Joe Rogan podcast about ultra-enduran

CBT-I is often called the gold standard for insomnia. Many people ask me, does CBT-I work for insomnia? And the honest answer is: it depends. Some of the most common words I hear in my practice are: “I tried it… and my sleep actually got worse.” Often, when clients say this, there’s something heavier underneath: “There must be something seriously wrong with me. Maybe I’m broken. Otherwise CBT-I would have worked.” That feeling of failure is painful, but it doesn’t mean you’re

(The real answers to the questions you’ve been silently asking yourself at 2 a.m.) If you’re reading this, you’ve probably wondered: Why can’t I sleep? Do I have insomnia? Is something wrong with me? Why did my sleep fall apart months after everything seemed fine? You’re not alone. These are some of the most common insomnia questions I hear, and once you understand what insomnia really is, a lot of the fear, shame, and frustration starts to lift. Insomnia Isn’t the Problem —

This winter in Montreal has been something out of a survival movie. It started back in November and hasn’t let up: ice storms, snowstorms, and weeks of minus-30 cold. My 13-year-old son started high school this year, and for the first time in his life, he doesn’t have a school bus that magically shows up every morning. Instead? A good 20-minute walk — in sub-zero temps. If you had asked me in October how he’d respond, I’d have said: “He’ll bundle up, trek like a champ, and co

Shaina was 29 when she reached out to me. I could hear it in her voice before she even finished her first sentence, the desperation, the exhaustion, the quiet panic of someone who hasn’t slept in a very long time. We booked a discovery call for later that same day. When she came on the screen, she looked put together. Makeup done. Hair styled. Wearing that Alo sweatshirt—you know the one everyone seems to own. If you didn’t know her story, you’d never guess anything was wrong

December was revealing. Working with clients this month, certain patterns kept showing up again and again. Some are obvious, some are subtle, but all of them tell the same story: real change isn’t instant, and the journey is often deeper than people expect. Here’s what I saw most often: 1. The pressure of “I need this fixed NOW!” Insomnia didn’t start last night. Many clients come desperate for a quick fix, and that pressure often creates more stress than relief. For example,

Let me ask you something. When was the last time you spent 20 minutes in quiet, no music, no podcast, no phone, no background noise keeping you company? Not meditating. Not journaling. Just… being. If that question makes you slightly uncomfortable, you’re not alone. Most of us are rarely with ourselves anymore. And sleep—ironically, is the one place we can’t escape it. We’re Surrounded by Noise (On Purpose) Take a look at how easily we fill space: A shower with the radio on A

So here is the truth! The last few weeks I’ve had bad nights. Not every night, but a few a week. And here is how I know I won’t go down a deep dark tunnel: I know it’s just a few weeks. Some nights I fall asleep right away. 20 to 30 minutes. Funny how we think the minute you hit the pillow you must sleep. Not true. Even for me, a sleep coach, sometimes it takes a bit. I know all about sleep hygiene. I’ve read hundreds of books, studied countless articles, and coached clients

Yesterday, I shared the story of a teacher who heard about someone dying from insomnia. The fear gripped her, and the panic spiraled night after night. But today, I want to explore another side of sleeplessness, the social and emotional side, the part we often don’t talk about: how talking about your insomnia can actually feed it. It sounds strange at first. After all, we all want support when we’re struggling. We want someone to listen, someone to understand how exhausted we

After Chanukah, the chaos finally quiets down. The food is gone. The guests are gone. The kids are back in school. Life is supposed to return to normal. And you are done. Done hosting. Done traveling. Done holding it all together. You crawl into bed exhausted — physically, mentally, emotionally, and you’re sure sleep will finally come. Except it doesn’t. You toss. You turn. You check the clock. 2:07 a.m. You’re so tired your eyes burn. Some nights, you’re literally crying fr

Today is the last day of Chanukah. Last night was the party. As a sleep coach, I often notice how moments of anticipation, even joyful ones, can quietly take over our nervous system. And for most of this week, my house felt like it was holding its breath. Not the loud, chaotic kind of excitement, but the tight, buzzing kind. The kind where kids count days the way adults count minutes before a flight takes off. For weeks, my kids were deep in decision-making mode. Flipping

"Two things can be true at the same time." I say this a lot. And honestly? Most people don’t get it at first. Drop it in a first session and some clients might give you the “Wait… what?” look. They come in expecting instant healing. Calm, happy, sleeping like a baby, problem solved. Yeah… that’s not how life works. Healing and progress aren’t all-or-nothing. You can feel calmer, happier, freer—and still wake up at 5 a.m., jittery, heart racing, stuck in your mind. And guess w

I read a line last week that stayed with me: “You are so poor that all you have is money.” At first, I laughed. Then I winced. Then I felt the weight of it—a quiet, uncomfortable truth that echoes in so many lives I see every day. Because it’s not about money at all. It’s about the part of us that can feel empty, no matter how full our calendars, our bank accounts, or our social standing might be. I work with teachers, therapists, business owners, and parents, people who are

A while back, I signed up for a business coaching program. I paid big bucks. I was promised massive results. And because I’m a hard worker, I showed up fully and diligently worked my way through the course. On paper, it should have worked. But it didn’t. And looking back now, the most painful part of that experience wasn’t the money. Not everyone thrives in every program — I understand that. Sometimes you do the work and things still don’t click. That’s life. What hurt was

It’s the first night of Chanukah. The menorah glows softly on the table, a tiny miracle of light—but Liba is staring at the ceiling, caught in the same nightly struggle she’s been fighting for years. Half a pill now? Another later? What if she wakes at 2 AM? Her body is exhausted, but her mind refuses to rest. For a while, things were different. After completing her three-month sleep coaching program, Liba had made incredible progress. She was down to a quarter of a pill, man

Yesterday, I wrote about my daughter Brenda, how she can’t wake up for school but pops out of bed at 6 AM on weekends. (If you missed it, go read it — it’s wild). https://www.chevymermelsteinsleepcoach.org/post/why-my-10-year-old-can-t-wake-up-for-school-but-pops-out-of-bed-at-6-am-on-weekends Today is the adult version of that story. Because if Brenda’s sleep is shaped by her thoughts, guess what? So is mine. So is yours. So is every adult who’s ever stared at the ceiling